I've moved over to http://nauczycielka-artysta.blogspot.co
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2. Do you own a gun? Most definitely NOT...I haven't even touched one before, they are scary.
3. What flavor Kool Aid was your favorite? None, I always thought it was too sweet. I was more of a "Tang" kid. :)
4. What do you think of hot dogs? I like them every once in a while.
( Read more... )
Brett had the video camera pointing at her, but not recording...then Sebastian started puking something up on the carpet so we were both looking at him... Brett felt movement and all of a sudden Lilly is on her back.
Damn Dog!
Elaine, Thornton
♥ How long have you been together?
Married for two on 2/17, Together for four on 7/19
♥ How long did you know each other before you started dating?
couple weeks
♥ Who asked who out?
I guess technically Brett asked me. He knew I wanted to be with him, he had some reservations...but one day decided that he wanted to be with me, and told me so.
♥ How old are each of you?
I'm 23, he's 24
♥ Whose siblings do/ did you see the most?
It's pretty equal. My oldest sister lives with my parents, and we see them about once a month. My other sister lives in Toledo, which is 15 minutes from where his parents live, and his youngest sister still lives with his parents...we see them also about once a month. His other sister lives 3 hours away for school, we see her 5 or so times a year.
♥ Do you have any children together?
Our beautiful daughter Lilliana Elizabeth, born 11/22/08
♥ What about pets?
Sebastian the pug, and 2 cats Atreyu (mr. poops) and Meeu (kitty)....yeah they have several names.
♥ Did you go to the same school?
Not even close
♥ Are you from the same home town?
See previous answer.
♥ Who is the smartest?
Brett is more book/science/math smart. I'm more logical/creative.
♥ Who is the most sensitive?
We're pretty equal.
♥ Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We try to go somewhere different every time we go out.
♥ Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Florida (From Michigan)
♥ Who has the worst temper?
Me. He is very passive...which makes me mad, lol. BUT we never ever fight...1 REAL argument in the 4 years together, and it wasn't even THAT bad.
♥ Who does the cooking?
More recently--he does, he is a chef for goodness sake :) But I do love to cook too.
♥ Who is more social?
We're pretty equal there.
♥Who is the neat freak?
Neither of us D:
♥ Who is the more stubborn?
Both, but somehow we are stubborn in different ways.
♥ Who wakes up earlier?
him
♥ Where was your first date?
Sushi and Movies (Willy Wonka)
♥ Who has the bigger family?
Me
♥ Do you get flowers often?
No :(
♥ How do you spend the holidays?
Thanksgiving we seem to switch off every other year. Christmas Eve/Morning at his parents, Christmas Day at my parents, day after Christmas is his mom's b-day, so we spend that with them too. Easter is usually at my parents but his family is invited as well.
♥ Who is more jealous?
Me...
♥ How long did it take to get serious?
We were engaged after 3 months.
♥ Who eats more?
Me right now. Since I'm breast feeding I'm constantly hungry LOL. Otherwise he does.
♥ Who does/ did the laundry?
Him
♥ Who’s better with the computer?
Him
♥ Who drives when you are together?
Him
(I love him (= )
I'm also working on #6, we got a wii fit! it is really fun, and I didn't think that it was going to work me as hard as I wanted but it kicked my quads ass, which reminds me, I should probably stretch this morning.
I've not been doing so good at reading to Lilly, I've recently picked up House of Leaves again...I would say it's not very appropriate to read to a baby.
I'm getting a massage today, which I totally need, so Hooray :)
That is all.
1. I tried very hard to have a home birth with my Daughter Lilliana, but I ended up being in labor for 94 hours and because of her position she wouldn't descend so I ended up with an emergency c-section.
2. I am not bitter about having to have a c-section because my daughter is so beautiful.
3.I've started to believe in a god again because of my daughter, she's so perfect.
4. I also feel very blessed to have such a wonderful husband.
5. I spent a lot of time and money thinking I was going to love my current career--I don't love it. It's just alright.
6.Because of #5 I'm going back to school this fall. I'm going to get my Teacher Certificate--BFA in Art Ed with a concentration in Art History, double major in English, minor in Psychology.
7.If I could be in school forever, and not have to worry about bills, I would.
8. I love to keep busy, at one point in my college career I took 29 credit hours, and worked 2 jobs...and did so successfully.
9. I don't think being a mommy is as hard as people warned me it would be.
10. I love to Canoe---found that out on our Honeymoon.
11. I love to explore nature in any way I can...I like to be lost in the woods and love camping.
12. Actually, I love to be lost anywhere---although I guess it's not considered lost if I have a map
13. I'm trying very hard to make my home as organic and natural of a place as possible, but I have a feeling that Brett and I are both too materialistic to go 100%.
14. I once wanted to be a Sex Therapist...I am not bashful at all when it comes to talking about subjects that include sexual topics, body parts...etc. I think it's very important to have a healthy sex life.
15. I am not modest yet I still have very low self esteem.
16.I love doing taxes...mostly because it means I get money.
17. I used to be a professional clarinetist...I haven't REALLY picked it up in almost 5 years...the corks are dry and pads are falling off.
18. I WANT to be good at playing clarinet again.
19. I also want to get back into the Theatre.
20. I can sing, quite well...but for some reason, unless I'm on stage, I'm very shy.
21. In fact, I've been married to my husband 2 years, and with him for 4 and he's never heard me REALLY sing.
22. I want to live everywhere that I can't, and when I do live in an 'exotic' place I don't want to live there anymore.
23. I'm in Debt. I want to be out of it by 2015.
24. I love to read but I never do.
25.My best friend lives in Texas, and I miss her more than anyone right now.
Now it's YOUR turn *points like uncle Sam*
Brett and I have decided on a delayed/selective vaccine schedule, and we started with 2 vaccines yesterday, Lilly had no idea what was going on. After the 2nd jab she looked stunned, she cried for less than 30 seconds. I nursed her right away, so I'm sure that took the edge off. She ended up being really sleepy the rest of the day, and most of today...her little legs are a bit sore but other than that she did wonderful :)
In other news I had been bleeding for more than 10 days so I decided to take my nuvaring out last night, I've pretty much stopped bleeding all together within 24 hours of doing so, so I think that I won't be using HBC anymore (thank goodness I never wanted to be back on it anyway). The plus side of the bleeding was that I tried out my diva cup and it works great so I don't need to buy a new one/size. The super downside to this is I'm not sure what form of birth control we're going to try now....IUD-nope, HBC-nope, Condoms-nope, anything that I have to use spermicide with (caps, diaphragms, Lea's shield)-nope....
I really REALLY do not want to get pregnant again, not right now...maybe not ever...but especially not right now. I'm going back to school this fall, and I'm finally going to finish up my Bachelor's degree, I want to get that out of the way and be set in a stable career before we even THINK about getting pregnant again....honestly I'm just fine with only having one child. One of my hangups with the thought of more than one child is how can I love them both equally? I guess I won't known until (if) I have another. I don't know how you moms with more than one can do it.
I would like to use FAM as our form of birth control, but I'm not really sure how one charts when they haven't started their period yet...I mean obviously you can't chart ovulation because you're not ovulating, but how do I know when I start ovulating? I'll have to read up on it more.
2. Drink more water--for hydration, detoxification, and to ensure a good breast milk supply.
3. Expand my business--work hard at making a client base.
4. Move forward with my career- Pay off my debt to BGSU, get into EMU, finish Art Degree, start teacher's certificate.
5. Make sure Brett knows that I love and appreciate him.
6. Loose 50lb--hopefully we will get a membership to the Y, otherwise I will make a point to be active (when weather permits)...going on walks with Lilly.
7. Spend at least 1 hour outside per day (when weather permits.)--doing the above, and just exploring nature.
8. Visit 5 states.
9. Write.
10. Pay off at least 2 credit cards.
Now the catch is... I actually have to start doing these things.
In other news, Brett and I are fast approaching our 2 year wedding anniversary. I'm trying to find a fancy shmancy restaurant for us to go to, it's proving to be harder than I thought it would be. I'm hoping we will get our W-2s soon so we can finish our taxes and get our return before our anniversary.
Annndd.. what else? I love my daughter. She is seriously the best baby anyone could ask for.
We'll just put down a rough draft, how about that?
1. Read a book a day---To Lilly, whether it be a mommy book or a baby book.
2. Drink more water--for hydration, detoxification, and to ensure a good breast milk supply.
3. Expand my business--work hard at making a client base.
4. Move forward with my career--- either get my national certification and start taking continuing education courses, or get my debt paid off to BGSU and get into EMU to finish up my bachelors degree, start on a teacher's certificate.
5. Figure out which option from #4 I am going to do.
6. Loose 50lb--hopefully we will get a membership to the Y, otherwise I will make a point to be active (when weather permits)...going on walks with Lilly.
7. Spend at least 1 hour outside per day (when weather permits.)--doing the above, and just exploring nature.
8. Visit 5 states.
9. Write.
10. Pay off at least 2 credit cards.
I think that's good for now...
On a different note, I started work yesterday--not bad at all. I ended up going in an hour late because of the IUD situation.
I got my IUD put in on Tuesday, it took 5 tries--which hurt..it hurt as bad, if not worse than labor....the thing fell out yesterday. My uterus does not like foreign objects. So I'm back on Nuva Ring--and it's tearing me up emotionally... because I don't want it to affect Lilly in any way. I don't want my milk supply to tank, and I don't want all of these hormones flowing through my body into hers...but at the same time I don't want another baby. This is pretty much my only option.
6 weeks of exclusively breastfeeding. (She was born on the 22nd but we were bullied into giving her formula to help with her jaundice for the first few days of her life...) But once my milk came in no more formula, YAY!
She's happy about it too!
When Brett got home from work I decided that I wanted to actually make love with him and enjoy sex instead of making it feel like a chore to get the baby out. He was up for it (duh). After that he decided since he just worked a long week and he had the next two days off that we should go out for some wings and a beer (which finding a place for that here in Ann Arbor proved to be more challenging than you would think). We ended up at this little dive in downtown Ann Arbor and ate just the type of meal we were looking for. While we were there I was joking about how that would be the last dinner we would eat out without a baby.
We were out pretty late, so when we got home we headed to bed. I was kneeling on all fours on the bed stretching my sore back, and when I went to turn over I felt this weird “pop”. I didn’t think too much of it because my pelvis had been cracking for weeks and the “pop” felt similar. When I sat up though the water started gushing! I was so excited I didn’t even know what to think. I said to Brett: “Um…uh…babe…I…..” He just looked at me waiting for me to finish my sentence… I got the words out: “I think my water just broke!!!!!” You know, I can’t even remember his response, I think he was all smiles but I cannot remember if he said anything or not.
I rushed off to sit on the toilet because it just kept leaking. I was shaking with excitement I thought that that was it, that within a matter of hours I was going to be a mommy, and my life with my husband was going to change forever. Little did I know Lilly had a different plan. I called Stacia (my midwife) to let her know what was going on, and then I called my mom, sister, and Brett called his parents… we were all so excited. Stacia told me just to go back to bed and get rest while I could because things were probably going to start progressing. She also said to call her back if contractions got stronger, longer, and 4 minutes apart or so, but otherwise we would just keep our appointment for the following morning at 10am. I felt like things were happening that night I was having contractions on and off and I just couldn’t sleep due to sheer excitement. Alas…nothing happened.
10am on Wednesday November 19, 2008 rolls around and I was as happy as could be. I thought that since nothing major happened the previous night that *this* was the day. Stacia called to let me know she was going to be a bit late because she wanted to make sure everything was together for the birth, this got my hopes up even more. When Stacia and Mandy came to our house they just checked me out as usual, listened to baby’s heart beat checked her position...etc. Baby still seemed to be posterior (facing forward) so Stacia gave me some exercises to do to try to get her to turn. She also said we can do some nipple stimulation to help things progress a bit but she wasn’t going to do anything too aggressive yet because she wanted to let labor come on its one, after all...my water had been broken for 12 hours at that point..How much longer could it take? She gave me some cleanser to prevent infection in my uterus, told me she would call to check up on me the next day, and off they went. My mom came over around noon, and hung out all day…and stayed the night….nothing happened. We decided to let her go back home, and we would call her when we knew things were going to happen.
This whole time I WAS having contractions, some were strong enough that I had to breathe through them but nothing was really happening… it was more annoying than anything. So, now it’s Thursday November 20, 2008. Just like that last two days nothing was happening. Brett and I went out for a walk hoping that that would move things along. It didn’t. At 8pm we decided to try the nipple stimulation, it really works, it made my contractions quite strong and very time-able (Brett was timing them for me, they were quite regular). I decided that it was time to set up the birthing pool because I thought at this point things were really going to start. ..They didn’t. I was really convinced too that they were because as Brett says I was “in the zone” I needed it quiet, and I needed him to pick things up…even a pillow sitting in the wrong place annoyed me. I was having strong contractions all night, the only comfortable position I could sleep in was sitting up in my big blue chair with my feet up on a dining room chair…sitting on towels because I was still leaking fluid. The whole night went by…nothing happened.
Friday November 21, 2008…seriously…nothing. Mandy stopped by to check on me for Stacia, she was optimistic because she thought the baby had turned to the proper position…she was wrong. The one good thing I heard from all of this is that Stacia really thought that this was the night. I really hoped so; I was really upset that I had told everyone because I kept getting “you STILL haven’t had her?”... Or “Oh my god that is dangerous you should go to the hospital!” because my water had been broken for so long (oh what are we at now…60 hours or so). At 8pm we did more nipple stimulation...and again I thought it was working, contractions were so bad that I actually needed to be in the pool. It was really nice, Brett lit some candles and I just relaxed in the pool. When I got tired of the pool we watched some Planet Earth DVDs and laid on the floor…it was a very mellow evening and things were picking up, Brett was timing things... but at the same time I was frustrated because I thought “this was it” for the last 72 hours so I told him to stop timing them because nothing was going to happen. He agreed to do so, but he added that he really thought “this was it”… this continued all night, and in the morning Brett called Stacia to give her an update. He also called my mom to tell her to come…because FINALLY, it was time.
Saturday November 22, 2008. I had been sleeping on the chair in my comfy position for the night (when I could... even though contractions were painful I was able to get some rest). I was in and out of the birthing pool all morning; I needed Brett to add warm water a few times. At one point I was out of the pool laying on the floor (I want to say around 10am or so) and I had a contraction so hard my whole body started to shake…it frightened me a bit so I told Brett that maybe it was time for Stacia to be with us. He called her, and she was over pretty soon. When she got there I was in my pool again, and I was in pretty good spirits I labored for maybe an hour or so in the pool. Stacia just hung out she said she wasn’t going to do much other than just observe me for awhile (and read our awesome Alton Brown baking book) until things were starting to pick up even more, but she said that I was doing really well and from what it seemed things were moving along nicely. Around noon or 1 I had to get out of the pool again, it’s amazing how our bodies react while in labor. When it doesn’t like how something feels or sounds or looks it hurts. I laid on the floor on my pile of blankets and pillows on my side with my knee propped…and just rested and labored for awhile. My mom got there… she just sat quietly most of the time. To be honest I didn’t want anyone there, but in the end it was good that she was there. I got back in the pool probably around 2…and labor started to get hard. I think it was sometime around there where I hit transition. I could hear rustling happening in my living room but it was all a haze. At this point in labor it was sort of like one of those sci-fi movies where you hear the weird music and see the hands spinning on a clock really fast and have no idea what is going on. I looked up at one point and Mandy was there…I have no idea when she got there but she was. Before I knew it I was pushing. I threw up several times in-between contractions... that was no fun. One thing that I made a point to remember around this time was that while I was pregnant people were saying that labor was the most painful thing you could ever go through. I disagree, I really could think of a lot of things that would hurt worse… and I sort of focused on those things while I was having a contraction. The contraction would start and I would think “being attacked by a shark would hurt worse than this”…that got me through it. A lot of time had gone by, even though it felt like 20 minutes…I think it was something like 4 or 5 hours…and nothing was happening.
We tried everything we could in the pool for the time being and the baby was just not budging. Stacia said we should try to go into the bedroom and lay on the bed and get my legs up by my head and push that way, once the baby started to descend we could move back to the pool. In the bedroom is when labor DID actually become the most painful thing I could ever imagine. I was so adamant on having my baby at home I didn’t care how much it hurt I did whatever I was told to. All I know is my mom and Brett and Mandy all took turns holding my legs up and if they even moved them and inch I yelled at them because I needed them to stay still. It got to the point where Stacia was trying to move my pelvic bones apart from the inside to help the baby come down…it just wasn’t working. I was screaming in pain, I remember asking Brett “why did we decide to have a baby?” and saying things like “Having a baby is the stupidest thing anyone could do”…”I want to die” and I also remember being worried about what the neighbors would think (I was told no big deal, they probably thought we were just having some amazing sex)... looking back I am really proud that *I* never once said “I want to go the hospital”… and I don’t really think I ever said “I can’t do this”. I know that Stacia left the room for a minute…and I was told after the fact that my mom went into the kitchen too and asked “is this going to happen?” It wasn’t. Around 8pm (24 hours in active labor…6 hours of pushing) Stacia told me to try to sit on the toilet…I did… it hurt.
Stacia came into the bathroom not too long after I sat down and broke the news…my pelvis and the way Lilly was facing was just not going to let her come out. We decided it was time to go to the hospital. I remember putting my robe on and slippers and running out of the house into the cold screaming “where is Brett with the car!?” I got in the back seat one knee on the floor one on the seat, and buried my face into the corner of the seat where it meets the door. And I screamed. I remember just screaming out one note and the vibrations in my head kept me focused. It felt like eternity to get to the hospital (that is 4 miles away)…we got there and I had to sit in a wheel chair…that sucked…the last thing I wanted to do was sit on my butt. I screamed the whole way to the triage. I got there and they immediately took me in and put a monitor on and did an ultrasound to see where baby was…the whole time I was screaming at them to knock me out…give me drugs… make the pain stop. Brett said he could hear me down the hall.
They took me into the operating room…they made me get on the operating table myself…ouch. They made me lean forward onto my contracting uterus...and put my hands out in front of me and told me to ‘relax’… I asked if they were “fucking kidding me”…I think that’s the only foul language I used the entire time… I am surprised and proud that I had that much control! After attempting 4 times the anesthesiologist got the spinal block in the correct place...and 2 seconds later I was no longer in pain… it was amazing. During the surgery my chest muscles hurt and I had a headache, and I was shaking uncontrollably…I was told these are all side effect of the spinal. Brett came in and held my hand, I him if they started the surgery yet...he said that I was cut open when he walked in, and they were pulling the baby out now. I could feel nothing. They pulled the baby out...Brett tried to take photos but of course the camera was not working at that very minute. I heard nothing…Brett could see Lilliana; she was pink...but no noise. I was worried, I kept asking if the baby was OK, but Brett was mesmerized… and didn’t answer me… finally I heard her cry… and that made me cry…and I knew everything was good. Lilliana Elizabeth English came into this big ‘ol world at 9:57pm on November 22, 2008, 94.5 hours after my water broke. She weighed 7lb 14oz and was 19.25inches long.
They wiped Lilly down and bundled her up and handed her to Brett… he was so happy and kept saying how beautiful she was. He asked if I wanted to hold her but I was shaking so bad I couldn’t. I let them finish stitching me up and put me on the recovery bed. As soon as they took the spinal out I stopped shaking. Brett handed me our daughter and at that moment every single thing that I went through to get to that point disappeared. It really was love at first sight. I am not a very religious person at all but Lilliana makes me believe in a god...she is so perfect in every way, I’m not sure what I did to deserve something so beautiful but she is mine, and for that I thank god.
I got into the recovery room and my mom was there with Stacia, and I was so happy. They both looked at her and agreed she was beautiful! The nurses came in to take care of me, and help me get her to latch on to breastfeed; she was a champ from the beginning. We ended up staying in the hospital for 4 days because Lilly had pretty bad Jaundice...but we got out on Thanksgiving in time to go have dinner with our family, if that’s not something to be thankful for, I don’t know what is.
When all is said and done it is obvious that things did not go the way I wanted…AT ALL. It just doesn’t matter though. My daughter is a beautiful angel and every time I look at her my heart melts. I am extremely proud of myself for what I went through I tried everything I possibly could to have the birth that I wanted but Lilliana just had a different agenda…and I’m OK with that. She is here, and she really is the love of my life.
Here she is 1 month later:
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mrsbenglish- Mrs. Briannon English
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